“Kick-Ass” is probably one of the most interesting movies I’ve seen in quite some time. It isn’t really a drama, it isn’t really a comedy, it isn’t really all action, it’s just kind of there, but not in the bad way like a closed McDonalds, but rather it actually blends all of those genres into something much grander.

“Kick-Ass” is the story of Dave, a gawky teenager who sucks at talking to girls and has two friends who are just as socially inept. One day, Dave decides to become a superhero. No reason. Just for the fuck of it, basically. He doesn’t have superpowers and his costume is a flamboyant wetsuit and Uggs. Like any perfectly sane teenager, he names his superhero Kick-Ass, and despite the fact that he clearly gets his ass handed to him on several occasions, he still finds a way to get famous, prompting two real-ish superheroes, a father-daughter pair, to court him. He then continues to fuck everything up, blah blah blah, drama.

You see, “Kick-Ass” isn’t your average superhero movie, at least at the start. It’s a very real look at a kid who decides to become a superhero. It explores the consequences of such exploits in the most brutal, gut-wrenching ways possible.

First things first: “Kick-Ass” is rated R for a reason. There’s blood. Lots of it. Some of it hilarious. A scene where a mafia squealer is put into a giant microwave (I’m not kidding) makes the whole film look like something out of the mind of Quentin Tarantino. It’s darker than the cute and colorful posters make it seem, and most of the humor is cruel (but still pretty damned funny).

Aaron Johnson plays “Kick-Ass,” the title character. He has glasses, a jew-fro and jerks off multiple times a day (seriously). Nicholas Cage plays Big Daddy and is surprisingly adept at his role, remaining likeable all while shooting his daughter in the chest (seriously). Hitgirl, played by Chloe Grace Moretz, is one of the movie’s more interesting characters and also seems to be the most brutal, going around and chopping off drug dealers’ legs (seriously). And finally, we have Red Mist, who’s played by McLovin (seriously.) And no, I will not refer to McLovin as Christopher Mintz-Passe, because that would be like referring to Spongebob Squarepants as Tom Kenny. He’s McLovin, dammit! And he always will be.

As the story progresses, things become much more complex as the lines between heroes and villains are blurred even more so than they were in other “gritty” superhero movies. Every character in the film is innately likable, even the ones we know are douchebags, which actually creates this very satisfying emotional connection to them. The consequences of Kick-Ass’s actions are far-reaching, and the film, though on the surface but a gory slasher, actually provides a very intelligently-written social commentary on friendship, relationships and the social order, all while never taking itself too seriously, resulting in moments where I actually laughed. I never laugh in movies. Checkmate, “Kick-Ass.”

I do have a few complaints, however.

First of all, the movie sort of spits in the face of its own “anyone can be a superhero message.” Consider this: McLovin is only a “superhero” (there are quotes for a reason but I don’t want to spoil anything for those who haven’t seen it) because his father, who’s also the film’s main villain, gives him a few hundred grand to buy a costume, Web site and tricked out Mustang (I still think Mustangs are girls cars, though). Hitgirl and Big Daddy are superheroes because of their seemingly unlimited access to bazookas and machine guns. And finally, Kick-Ass is only a superhero because he got fucked up in a parking lot and had metal plates installed in his bones, making him impervious to most pain.

What the fuck? I thought the message of the movie was “Anyone Can Be a Hero,” not “Anyone Can Be a Hero as Long as They’re Rich, Have Access to Unlimited Heavy Weaponry or Have Bones Made of Fucking Titanium.” Thanks a lot, “Kick-Ass.” There I was ready to don a cape and mask and go around fighting crime in Radford, but then you go and laugh in my face and tell me I can’t. Looks like the closest thing I’ll ever come to being a hero is providing the last ten bucks for a fresh keg at a party. Oh well…

I’m also a little pissed off that the title character is actually the least-interesting character in the movie, yet we’re stuck with him for pretty much 80 percent of it. He’s boring, nerdy, with no family problems and his only redeeming quality is that he pretends to be gay to pick up girls (I wish I could pull it off, but I’m just so damned hetero). I don’t want to watch someone just like me for two hours; that’s boring. I can watch myself at home. It’s like watching a (hetero) porno that focuses more on the guys than the girls. I have a penis, I can look at it any time I want. That’s not why I’m watching the damn thing! That’s what “Kick-Ass” does. It has five primary characters, including Mark Strong, who plays a fantastic villain in the form of Frank Domico and the father of Red Mist, yet the movie sticks us with the least-interesting one for two hours.

McLovin is actually the most complex character in the whole thing. Even now, I’m still not quite sure what side he’s on (it’s actually been bothering me). His motives are originally evil, as he’s planning to lure Kick-Ass in so his father can execute him, but then a friendship blossoms, a friendship he’s obviously been craving, but then there’s betrayal, but then there’s just who-the-fuck-knows. He may be good, he may be evil, he may just be trying to impress his dad, who obviously loves his son (the chemistry between Mark Strong and McLovin is great; they really do feel like a true father-son dynamic). I can’t even imagine what’s going through Red Mist’s mind, and the result is one of the most authentic characters ever in a superhero movie, and it’s disappointing that he isn’t more fleshed out.

I cannot believe I’m saying this, but “Kick-Ass” is probably the most emotionally resonant superhero movie of all time. I mean that. More emotional than even the immortal “The Dark Knight.” The characterization is great, the action scenes are bloody and fun, and the story is satisfying to the very end. Go see it. Now.

Also, Hitgirl, call me in about five years, sweet pea.

Cover and story photos from Creative Commons

Tags: comic book movies, Kick-Ass, reviews

This entry was posted on Friday, April 30th, 2010 at 12:00 am and is filed under Ritz. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.