Category Archives: Poetry

My Horizon

I want you, but I don’t.

The pain in my chest is weakening.

How did this happen? I need a drink.

Where did the past two years go?

I was so sure of myself and I thought I understood my emotions.

Why oh why am I suddenly feeling this way.

I didn’t want you, threw you out, and not in the best way.

In fact, I was relieved to be free of you. I was young and free.

The last thing I wanted was you.

But suddenly, it has become apparent that you were there all along.

You were always with me. In the back of my mind,

I knew you always loved me, and I needed that.

Why did I hurt you? You were always so nice.

I used to think that I was better than you, you told me I was a couple of times,

But now I see, the one that was mistaken was me, for you are far greater.

Your beauty as a person shines bright and attracts people towards you.

My mother said you wouldn’t be single for too long,

I guess this was just something else she was right on.

I feel raw and wounded.

I feel like a fool.

Why did you let me push you away?

If you loved me the way you said you did, why did you just let me walk away?

Sometimes, I think it’s because you thought I deserved someone different,

Someone greater, but other times,

I fear it’s because you gave up on me, on us.

I’m sorry I was difficult, rude, young, immature, nasty, selfish and proud.

I’m happy for you in all that you do. I see that you are whole with her.

I’m sorry I couldn’t give you that.

My world was small then, and I didn’t understand love,

maybe I still don’t, but I have learned that when you love someone, you want what is best for them.

She is better for you; I’m still searching for my horizon.

Cover graphic by Kasey Sutphin

Even When…

 

Even when your heart breaks
And they’re not there,
Life just takes,
All that’s fair.
Your heart wakes,
Your eyes to stare,
At what makes
You and your soul care.

Even when you make mistakes
And hurt someone,
You slam on the breaks.
Because you realize what you have done,
And when your soul aches,
Look to the sun.
He knows what it takes,
And in him you have won.

Even when you fall on the ground,
Don’t give up on your dream.
Just listen for a sound,
And something will gleam.
By the one who’s crowned,
He is supreme,
And he will surround.
Because you’re on his team,

Even when they aren’t around.
And you feel all alone,
Don’t go drowned,
You’re just in a zone,
Look to the rebound.
And how much you’ve grown,
Look at what you have found.
When you’re seated before the throne,

Even when everything’s not perfect.
And it seems it never will be,
Don’t let it affect
What you truly see.
For it’s direct,
And it’s a guarantee.
You can connect,
And you can be free.

Even when they reject,
And you feel ignored,
Remember he is here to protect
Just wait to be restored.
And gain the respect,
By getting your reward.
You will be correct,
Just look to the Lord.

Cover graphic by Kasey Sutphin

He Sits in Darkness

He Sits in Darkness

He sits in darkness, knowing that he did wrong.
He tries to stop the tears that are flowing down his face,
Thinking why has this hiding been going on so long?
It’s like he is losing his humanity in the cold and dismal place.

Why can he do to put things back together?
His mind spins ’round, trying to find an escape.
Surely this pain can’t go on forever,
Can it be fixed with some superglue and tape?

A knock on the door interrupts his thought,
And when he opens it, on his face is not even a fake smile.
His eyes can’t believe what he has wrought,
When he sees the cops and their guns facing him, hostile.

He sits in jail now, wishing he could go back
And change the way his life was turning out.
But there was a light shining in the pitch black,
His friends still loved him, and he knew without a doubt.