Ever been drunk and starving? Maybe just had an extreme case of the I’m-going-to-vomit-should-have-had-some-dinner? Is this you every Saturday night? You aren’t alone, surprising as that is. In fact, there are a shocking number of people who may benefit from a drunk-friendly menu to peruse on their 21 and over weekend adventures.
With you in mind, we here at Whim decided to make that very menu for our dear readers.
The number one favorite drunk food is, of course, pizza. And in Radford, it can be further specified: the pizza roll. In fact, if you make it through your time here at RU without following a Mad Dog and some Solo cup beers with a box of Mike’s Pizza Rolls, you can claim the same type of rarity as a unicorn. Congratulations.
Here’s the thing, though: pizza’s bad for you. Sober you isn’t necessarily going to be happy with drunk you’s diet choices. Why? Well, other than the likelihood of vomiting increasing, the calorie and fat intake could endanger hungover you to gain weight over repeated offenses. It will certainly enhance the chances of a breakout or greasy skin, and generally make that next day less enjoyable.
Instead, try some of these healthy alternatives:
First, the cracker or toast. It’s common knowledge that bread is good for alcohol absorption. Something about those complex carbs just sucks it all up and makes you feel a little more sober and a whole lot better. Even better, if you can make sure you’re eating whole wheat. The vitamin B involved will also increase your chances of a smooth recovery.
If you’re jonesing for something a bit more towards the junk food category, try some salty popcorn. It’s a low-calorie alternative to chips that result in less morning-after guilt. Added bonus? Popcorn is pretty cheap, particularly if you’re drinking at home and keep a box handy for just these occasions.
Oatmeal, cereal, pancakes, and waffles are all delectable choices of drunk food. Now, while hot and cold cereals are still relatively healthy, they’re also loaded with sugars. Be aware, but don’t avoid if you get a craving. They also have those alcohol absorbing qualities we’re after. Pancakes and waffles, while equally cravable breakfast foods, are anything but low in calories and if you douse them in syrup will also run you high in the sugar intake. But so what? You’re drunk, remember? These will absorb that right up.
Now, fried rice is a go-to drunk food that doubles as a great hangover food — but that whole fried thing isn’t doing you much good. Instead, try for some steamed rice. Try it with a little low-sodium sauce of your choice if plain isn’t your thing.
Chicken noodle, vegetable, or miso soup are definitely worth a shot. I know, I know. Who eats soup when they’re drunk? Yes, please avoid the stove if you’ve had a few shots. But don’t hate on a healthy way to get your salt cravings taken care of! (But opt for a side of crackers if you want any chance of sobering up from the meal.)
Finally, if you really have to have that pizza, get the veggie with no cheese or a slice of white pizza. Slightly better for you and you still get to give in to that timeless call.
While this takes care of all the recommended foods while you’re still in party mode, don’t forget that a banana and as much water as you can safely stomach throughout your night is going to go a long way towards making tomorrow morning a peaceful one for you and your toilet!