Tag Archives: friends

College and Old Friends

Friends
“If I had one piece of advice for you as a reader, it would be to appreciate the time you have with your friends.” Photo from: http://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/08/15/6360682710224914221617167464_bigstock-Group-Of-Friends-Having-Fun-To-58863776.jpg

You meet so many people in college. The friends that you meet during freshman year don’t usually last long. But I met a good one. I met Rhiannon in History class in my first class in college. I was so nervous and her big personality brought me out of my shell. We started to hang out outside of class, and we just clicked. We ended up being roommates during my sophomore year and then junior year also. But during my sophomore year, I met the wrong people that turned me against her. They weren’t good for me. I didn’t really notice until it really affected our relationship. That is by far one of my biggest regrets in college. But she is one of the most forgiving women that I have met in my life. Sadly, we didn’t get to totally fix our friendship before she graduated. Sometimes you meet the one friend that will be there for you no matter what you do, and she was it. She was that friend. If I had one piece of advice for you as a reader, it would be to appreciate the time you have with your friends and live like your days are numbered. Tomorrow is only for a fool’s calendar. So don’t treat life like you have unlimited days, because you don’t. Talk to that one friend that you regret saying goodbye to. Because chances are, he or she misses you too.

Are You The Hermione Granger Of Your Squad?

The two of you are more alike than you think.

Do you stay up all night practicing spells? If you answered yes to that question, then this article is for you. All I want in life is to be Hermione Granger, and this article will tell you what makes you two alike. You won’t need Felix Felicis for this one.

1. Puberty hit you like a train.

Like all preteens, we went through that phase we do not speak of. In the books, Hermione used magic to fix her teeth and hair. Unfortunately, because we Muggle folks never received our Hogwarts letters, we had to turn to the simpler stuff like flat irons, Invisalign and makeup.

  1. You have a hard time expressing your feelings to your crush.

Honestly, most girls I know keep their feelings about their crush to themselves. There are times when your adrenaline is pumping and all you want to do is just grab him and kiss him. It can sometimes be hard because you do not know how the other person feels. But you never know. He could feel the same way, or you guys could be destined to defeat evil and have two children together.

  1. You get mad when you get a B on an exam.

Sometimes just getting a C on a test that you studied hard for is better than nothing, but for people like Hermione, C’s do not get degrees.

  1. You are a cat person.

Cats are not for the fainthearted. That is all I have to say about that.

  1. You are often found reading or studying.
Hermione
“Unfortunately, because we Muggle folks never received our Hogwarts letters, we had to turn to the simpler stuff like flat irons, Invisalign and makeup.” Photo from: http://newscult.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/Hermione-Granger-hermione-granger-20053428-800-478.jpg

Rather than partying or watching the usual on Netflix, you are found with your nose in a book

  1. You have a free spirit.

You are a bit of a free bird. You don’ let anyone tell you that you can’t reach your goal, and you don’t let anyone get in your way of achieving it.

  1. You are a fighter.

On the rare chance that your life is in danger, you don’t just stand there and take it.

  1. You are resourceful.

You always know just what to do in most situations. You always have a plan B because most of your plans do not go as planned — and that is what the Undetectable Extension Charm is for.

  1. You know how to comfort a hurting friend.

You are always in tune with people’s emotions. You are the friend who knows how to comfort your friends when they are feeling down.

  1. You are an avid rule follower. However, if the ones you love were in trouble, you would break every rule under the sun to protect them.

Hermione has broken the rules countless times to protect her friends, and you are no different. You think of the well-being of your friends rather than the possible consequences of your actions.

  1. You will follow your best friends to the ends of the earth.

You are a loyal friend. Silly books and spells will not pick you up when you’re feeling down, give you a shoulder to cry on, or laugh with you. Friends will do all those things and more. You just have to be willing to take a chance on them.

 

 

“How Will You Get to Know Someone If You’re Not Allowed to Date?”

If I were to charge $10 for each time somebody asked me that question, you’d probably see me featured under a headline that reads Success Stories of the Century. I always wonder to myself– how can you NOT get to know someone without dating them? Is it really that complicated?

What is dating? And why do I even speak of it as a Muslim woman?

If you lack the company of diverse friends in your life, you probably also paint arranged marriages badly and see me as the least credible to speak on this matter. But, yes, a percent of us does look further than the whole arranged situation; though nothing is wrong with that.

Religion may have nothing to do with you receiving this question, no; you’re probably just not into the whole dating scene. Or maybe you did try to date in the past, and you’re too hesitant to put in that kind of time and energy figuring the person out only to call it off for not working out.

friends
“There are so many ways to get to know somebody without actually dating them.”

Caroline Zelonka, a freelance writer, exemplifies this best:

I met most of my partners at work. Typically, the relationship would start as a work friendship, segue into a platonic out-of-work friendship, then blossom into a romantic attraction.

It’s really an ideal way to start things. In my opinion, one often shows their best self at work. Your brains and resourcefulness take the lead. I suppose your physical attributes are also showing, but I have had much better results when I had a chance to “wow” the guy with my personality rather than rely on my looks or charm in the artificial situation of a date.

Being “friend-zoned” isn’t always a bad thing, nor do I think it’s even real to be completely honest with you. There are so many ways to get to know somebody without actually dating them, and my favorite approach would be friendship. I feel like relationships which begin on the basis of that sort of understanding—as friends have it—last longer compared to those that jump straight into one . . . but that’s just my opinion.

What Whim has taught me

Whim always has the right of way. Graphic from rubycantu.com
Whim always has the right of way. Graphic from rubycantu.com

When I started working for Whim, I honestly didn’t know what to expect. I thought it would be easy, non-stressful, and somewhat boring, to be honest. I thought that I would have no trouble finding people to write for me, that they would write all five articles and turn them in on time, and that I would have barely any work to do. But, boy, was I wrong. I couldn’t find anyone to write for me. In fact, Molly, another employee for Whim, writes all my science, technology, and health articles, and I write all over her opinion articles. We have a good system going, but of course, it would have been easier if we had writers. Although working for Whim was more stressful and difficult than I thought it would be, I would never trade it for anything.

Whim taught me how to work under pressure and strict deadlines, which I know will come in handy for my next job. I learned how to write better than I did before. Whim taught me how to write more than all four years of high school english did. I understood what it meant to truly rely on other people to get work done. I realized that I really do love working with a team and two heads are better than one, as they say. I learned that friends don’t have to be the same as you. I met some amazing people this year, including our editor-in-chief, Becca, our managing editor, Janie, and the rest of the Whim writers. I probably would have never had the pleasure of meeting these people if it wasn’t for Whim, if it wasn’t for walking past the Whim booth at club day, one that I was forced to go to by my University 100 class. Whim taught me more valuable life lessons than I ever initially thought possible.

When I first entered college, I never wanted to join any outside clubs or work anywhere on campus. To be honest, I was kind of bitter about starting college because my high school experience was less than amazing. But Whim really made my first year at Radford much more enjoyable than I could have ever imagined. I looked forward to our budget meetings, as weird as that sounds, because I couldn’t wait to talk to my new found friends. Whim made my college experience something much more than just school and for that, I will always be thankful.

Surrounding Yourself With Positive and Supportive People

high five

 

In high school it can be difficult to find real friends who you will stay friends with even after you all go off to separate colleges and make more, new friends. I have a few friends from high school who I still talk to all the time and see when I go home from school on vacation or breaks. My parents, especially my mom, used to tell me to make sure I was friends with people who wanted me to succeed and were happy for me when I did. Some people can be deceiving and secretly want you to fail instead of be the best you can be.

When I came to college it was weird at first because I really didn’t know anyone and I didn’t know who to be friends with and who would be a real friend to me. I remember talking to my mom on the phone my freshman year and talking about certain people on my hall and how I felt something was off about them because they never seemed happy when I was doing well with soccer or my grades. My mom used to give me advice on staying close to a few people I really enjoyed being around and we all wanted each other to succeed and lift each other up.

I have found my group of close friends who I trust with anything and know that they are happy when good news comes my way and vice versa. It’s nice when you’re around people who are positive and have a good attitude towards life and experiences. There is a huge difference surrounding yourself with positive people than with negative ones.

You can almost feel a shift in the environment and energy around yourself when you go from negative to positive. You feel uplifted and content when you’re with your real friends because they are positive and want you to be the best you can be. It’s a good feeling knowing you have friends who will be there for you and be proud of you and you can be equally proud of them when they succeed and do the best they can at something.

Why I’m Staying For Graduation Even Though I’m Not Graduating Yet

12485997_1631232893796295_6369103290722510228_o
Photo of Kristen Jameson, Photo By Caitlin Horan

Last spring, I stayed for graduation even though I was only a sophomore. I stayed because I had some friends graduating and they convinced me a few more days at school wouldn’t hurt me because it was summer and I would be going home on vacation anyway. I’m very glad I ended up staying because I had a great weekend with some friends that I barely get to see anymore. This spring I will also be staying for graduation again even though I am a junior now and still have one more year before it’s my turn to graduate.

Most students are eager to be done with exams and head home for the summer. They are tired of being around the same people and they’re ready to go home to their families and homemade meals. I believe that sticking around for graduation is worth the sacrifice of a few extra days at home. It can be a hard decision choosing to stay at first because you just want to get home and think about summer and not having to do schoolwork or being anywhere near school. However, if you do stay you will find out that it was worth your time.

There are a bunch of families of the graduating students that come up for the whole weekend and it’s nice meeting everyone’s parents and siblings. Getting to hear stories from your friends’ childhoods and how or where they grew up is funny and interesting. Another perk of staying for graduation is the cookouts that everyone has all around at different apartments and houses. There’s a lot of food and desserts around everywhere and everyone is in a great mood because the parents are happy and proud of their kids graduating and the kids are happy and proud of themselves for graduating.

I couldn’t imagine not sticking around for graduation anymore. It’s something I’m looking forward to but also sad about because some of my best friends will be graduating this year. It’s a melancholy time celebrating graduation but it’s worth staying the extra few days and postponing the end of school year spring drive home for the summer.

Don’t put a price on your love

Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate your love for the people in your life. It’s a day, specifically for your significant other, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be. Valentine’s Day is a day that can either be fun or miserable and it’s up to you which road you want to take.

I know all of the single people out there get lectured by their friends in relationships about how it doesn’t have to be a sad day, how it can be cute and fun to hang out with your other single friends, but I know you’re thinking “well of course you can say that. You have a boyfriend/girlfriend. You have someone to love and be with on the most romantic day of the year.” But Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be strictly romantic. It can be about showing your love for the people who stick by you through all of your ups and downs, who love you when you think no one else can. Those are the people who should be celebrated on this Valentine’s Day.

You can share tots with anyone, not just a romantic interest. Photo from Pinterest
You can share tots with anyone, not just a romantic interest. Photo from Pinterest

Valentine’s Day is the type of holiday that is simply made to get people to buy things. The consumer industry made this day up so people in relationships will buy the flowers and the chocolates and the giant stuffed teddy bears in order to show the one they love that they care. It’s designed to put a price on love, to show that if I buy you 12 dozen roses it means that you love your significant other more than the person who could only afford one.

But what happens when you love someone so much, more than you could even describe, but unfortunately, your wallet isn’t as big as your love is? You begin to feel inferior and insecure because you can’t buy the one you love all the things on Valentine’s Day that you think they deserve. Your significant other sees all of their friends whose boyfriends or girlfriends were able to buy them the big bouquets and giant stuffed animals while you’re left sitting at home feeling guilty for not being able to do those things for the person you love. That’s what Valentine’s Day does to people.

On this Valentine’s Day, don’t put a price on your love. You and your significant other deserve better than that. Spend quality time together, watch a movie. You can celebrate your love without spending money. Be happy. Be in love. Don’t worry about the rest of it.

What do you do when the person you love breaks up with you and then wants to get back together?

What do you do when the person you love breaks up with you and then wants to get back together? Two very close friends of mine started dating senior year of high school. They were friends for a while before they took their relationship to the next level. I would say that they fell in love. They were basically the same person but in different gendered bodies. They were both hippies, had the same political views, same interests, and were both very free spirited. The problem came when, let’s say Fred, started realizing he didn’t really know who he was as a person. He started questioning everything he knew and everything he was, whether it came to sexuality or what all of his feelings meant in general. He lost sight of why he fell in love with, let’s say Velma, and started becoming very depressed. Long story short, Fred broke up with Velma, leaving Velma very confused and heart broken.

Does Fred deserve a second chance? Photo from youtube
Does Fred deserve a second chance? Photo from youtube.com

I think, in this situation, it all comes down to bad timing. In high school, everything is confusing and nothing make sense. It’s a time for discovering who you are, what you like and dislike, and what you look for in another person. Fred had no idea what he wanted and didn’t want to lead Velma on if she wasn’t it. Velma was very confused and just wanted to talk it out with Fred, but Fred just couldn’t do it. He wanted to be alone, to have time to think about everything he’s been questioning. After some time, Fred and Velma started talking again and started being friend.

Six months later, Fred realized that the thought of Velma being with someone else made him sick. He wanted to give their relationship another chance and be with Velma again. Velma, of course, agreed because she loves him and has always wanted to be with him. They were highschool sweethearts, so to speak. Would have you done the same? I know I would have, and I did. No one can say truly say they would have done this or that differently because when it comes to love, no one can honestly decide what best. Love overtakes all the senses and makes us crazy. I believe they should give it a shot because taking risks is what creates the most amazing outcomes. Life is too short to give up people who deserve second chances.

F is for friends who leave you behind

When I came to Radford, I had a good number of friends. Most of them were high school friends, some of which I had been friends with since elementary school and middle school. We did everything together. We were “those girls”. The ones who hung out everyday after school, talked about boys (and girls later on), school, family, and everything in between. When I was having trouble at home, they were my family. They held me when I cried, laughed until our stomachs hurt, and stayed up all night talking about nothing and everything. To say the least, they were my girls.

However, things started to change senior year of high school and into our first year at Radford. I got into a relationship and they started to, slowly, stop talking to me. I don’t think it was on purpose, but it happened. We didn’t hang out anymore and they started finding other friends to be around all the time. Then when I came to Radford, most communication stopped completely, even though two of “my girls” go here now. They only talk to me when I talk to them first, and sometimes they still don’t respond. I don’t know if it’s because college has made them feel like they don’t need old friends anymore or if they just grew out of our friendship. Either way, it impacted me way more than I know it impacted them.

When friends leave you behind for better friends. Photo from Pinterest
When friends leave you behind for better friends. Photo from Pinterest

It was a big change for me that I wasn’t expecting. I met my “best friend” in second grade and she had been through everything with me. We grew up together and are the people we are now because of each other. I know how gay it sounds, and not gay as in insulting but literally gay, but it’s hard when your friends, who you thought would always be there for you, just aren’t anymore. It sucks feeling left out, especially when your friends still talk to each other but not you.

But I guess that’s a part of growing up. You move on and find new people to make memories with. I try and tell myself that everything happens for a reason and if they don’t make an effort to be in your life, then you shouldn’t waste your energy on people who don’t care enough to try harder for you. You deserve the best there is and if you aren’t receiving the best, find people who will give it to you.

Parties are overrated

It’s okay to be a loner and not go out to parties. You want to know why? Well, because it’s completely healthy to like to be by yourself. It’s also very healthy to not drink or smoke or what to put yourself in a potentially dangerous situation.

Partying doesn’t have to be a right of passage into adulthood. You don’t need to prove yourself by going out to parties and getting wasted while people draw penises on your forehead while you’re passed out. Going to parties isn’t for everyone and you should never feel pressured into doing something you don’t want to do.

I don’t like going out to parties. I don’t like the idea of being around drunk people who are trying to act sober, who are trying to hit on me, or who are trying to not vomit or help their friend who is vomiting. I don’t think it’s insane to think these circumstances are not fun or even that they’re anxiety inducing. A lot of people don’t take into account the amount of anxiety that parties and other gatherings with that many people can cause. Being put into a small house with a large amount of loud and drunk people could cause anyone to have a minor freak out.

Parties involve drinking. There really is no way around it. You can have all the intentions in the world of going to a party and not drinking, but when five to ten people are shoving drinks in your face and you realise you aren’t having a good time because everyone else is drunk, you’re most likely going to start drinking, the first of many bad decisions of the night. You didn’t intend on drinking so you drove all your friends there; unfortunately, now that you’re drunk you think “Oh, well I drove here so now I have to drive home.” So you do. Then you end up crashing your car, hurting your friends, and going to jail. See what one bad decision can do? I’ve never seen the good effects or results of going to party so I don’t see why I should.

Find some friends and skip the party. Or just watch friends and skip the party. Photo from mtv
Find some friends and skip the party. Or just watch friends and skip the party.
Photo from mtv

It’s completely okay to not want to party. In fact, I think it’s the better choice. Staying home, on the couch with a good show and a bowl of popcorn with a few friends is safer and more fun than going out and getting wasted. Try it. I think you’ll like it.

The life lessons inside “Friends”

Friends was an influence to many. Graphic from Huffington Post
“Friends” was an influence to many. Graphic from Huffington Post

“Friends” is a timeless television show that many people have enjoyed for years now. If you’ve never seen “Friends”, it is about six people that are a group of friends, and the episodes focus on things that happen to everyday people but make them hilariously funny.

There’s Joey, who’s the one that lacks a little common sense but is a sweetheart. There’s Phoebe, who’s a little quirky and tells it like it is no matter what. There’s Monica, who loves to cook, is a clean freak, and likes to be the mom of the friend group. There’s Chandler, who’s awkward and clumsy but tells the best jokes through the entire series. There’s Ross, who’s Monica’s brother and is a dorky paleontologist who’s a good guy to everyone. And last, but not least, Rachel, who’s the one who was cut off from her parents and worked her way up to a dream job that she’s very dedicated to.

One thing that all the friends have in common is that they’re all great friends to one another. They have their moments of insanity and breakdowns, but all in all they’re good people and all they really care at the end of the day is each other’s happiness.

The show goes through events that happen to everyday people like you and me, but the show makes it funny so that it’s relatable for anyone. I’ve learned a lot from simply watching “Friends”, such as if something awkward happens it’s better to just laugh it off.

If you and your friend get in an argument, it isn’t the end of the world and you two will make up and move on from it stronger than before. When you’re going through a tough time in your life, you will always have your good friends to pick you up and carry you along the way until you can stand on your own again.

 

You should go to therapy. Trust me.

Have you ever thought about going to therapy? Maybe you’re thinking “I don’t need to go to therapy. Isn’t therapy for people who are really struggling with intense issues or they’re just crazy?” Well that isn’t necessarily the case. Yes, a lot of people who are in therapy are struggling with depression, anxiety, or other mental issues; however, therapy is simply an outlet for people to talk about their problem, whether they’re anxiety driven or not.

Going to a therapist was one of the best decisions I ever made. I began going to therapy because I was dealing with anxiety and struggling with my sexual identity; however, after I figured all of those things out, I continued to go because it was one of the most therapeutic and relaxing experiences I have ever had. I was allowed to talk about things, drama and other stressors, without the back and forth you have to have with your friends. I sat there for an hour as she listened to me talk and talk and my crappy friends and my messed up parents and she gave me advice and support. With friends, they can say “I’m here for you” and all those other cliche phrases but you know deep down that they have their own lives to deal with and they’re just waiting for their turn to talk. With therapy, the therapist sits there and talks to you like you’re friends but doesn’t expect anything in return from you. They are simply there to help guide you in the right direction and make sure that you are going to be okay. It’s fulfilling and relieving.

And how does that make you feel?  Photo from healthcommunities.com
And how does that make you feel?
Photo from healthcommunities.com

The best part about going to therapy is they know nothing about you. They don’t know anyone else’s side of the story and they don’t know the history of you or anyone else in your life. When you complain about someone or something, they have zero bias on the situation so they can give you honest and genuine advice about the situation. They tell you how it is based on the information you give them. With friends or parents, they usually understand the whole situation or have known the other people in the scenario, making it harder for them to stay unbiased. If you’re choosing between talking to a friend or a therapist, I’d go with therapy every time.

I understand that therapy isn’t for everybody; however, if you’ve never tried it what’s the harm? You may discover that you love it and it helps you more than any friend ever could or you could realise that you hate it and you never want to go back again and that’s okay too. Whatever the outcome may be, try therapy. It made me a happier person.

Misconceptions about love

Love can mean so many things to so many people. It has a different definition for every situation. It can mean “I care about you, deeply” or “You are my one and only” or even “You are my best friend and I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

However, many people think love is the almighty power, that it can heal a broken heart and cure all pain in the world. This is a misconception. Love isn’t suppose to complete you or fill the void of self-loathing. It isn’t suppose to tell you your worth or how you value yourself.

Love is suppose to be something extra to enhance your life, not be the sole reason for your happiness. It allows you to share your life with another person, to tell them about the success you are having or even the hardship you are dealing with. Love should be the icing on the cake, not the ingredients.

One of the most common things I hear among my friends is “why can’t someone just love me? Everything would be so much better if I had someone to love me.”

First of all, one person cannot be the solution to all of life’s problems. Why would the love of somebody else make everything in life better? I feel as though if you need to love and affection of someone else to make you happy, then you are lacking in self-love and need to take a step back and find the strength in you to love yourself.

No one should feel like they need to depend on someone else to feel love because who knows how long that person will be in your life and when they’re gone, what will you be left with?

"[Y]ou don’t need to find your other half because you aren’t a half to begin with." Image from someecards.com
“[Y]ou don’t need to find your other half because you aren’t a half to begin with.” Image from someecards.com
Another phrase I hear frequently from my friends is “I want to find my other half, someone to complete me.” What I have to say to this is, you don’t need to find your other half because you aren’t a half to begin with. You are a whole person who can depend on yourself and love yourself. You are a complete person. You are not broken. There is nothing wrong with wanting another person to share your life with, to come home to and love with all that you are. But making another person your sole person in life and the only reason you can find your self-worth isn’t healthy.

Self-love should come first before you find another person to share your love with. There needs to be enough to go around.

Love can be life-changing, miraculous, and beautiful all at the same time. It can make you a better person, a happier person, but love should come from everywhere, not from one single person. Remember who you are and what you stand for before allowing yourself to share that with someone else.

What it’s like being the competitive one

When I was younger, my family would play board games. Seems pretty normal, a family that plays board games together and has a fun time joking and messing around. Normal was not a common description when it came to games in my house growing up. We wouldn’t play games just for fun, we would play them to win.

It sounds a little intense, but that’s because it was. My family is a strong willed, independent, and win hungry bunch. I love that about my family. They

Even during board games, being competitive can be frustrating. Graphic from Wikipedia
Playing board games can bring out your competitive side. Graphic from Wikipedia

have taught me to never settle and to always strive to be the best I can be. Granted, it spills over into my social life and certain things that are supposed to be “just for fun”, but that’s okay. It’s okay with me that I can get a little too competitive sometimes because I would rather be a go-getter than anything else.

At family events I am always joked about for being so competitive and into certain games and activities, but I don’t mind anymore. At first, when I was younger, I used to get frustrated by it and I didn’t understand why no one else would care as much as I did about a beach volleyball game or marco polo in the pool. Now, I understand that some people just don’t care about winning, especially when it comes to summer backyard games with your 60-year-old grandma.

None the less I’ll still continue to be the overachieving, constantly moving forward, and win craving person that I have always been. I am thankful to have a family that believes in me so much and pushed me to be the person I am today. It only takes a small toll now of my friends having to deal with my intense strategies when playing monopoly on a Wednesday night.

If you’re the competitive one in your friend group or family, don’t be ashamed or embarrassed. Be proud of your ability to seek triumph and glory! Go out there and win whatever it is you desire!

 

Fair-weather friends

Everyone has that friend that only talks to you when they need something. You know the kind. That one person who only texts you once in a blue moon, when they need homework or advice. They only call you up when they’ve broken up with their boyfriend and need a shoulder to cry on.

Don’t you hate being that friend? Don’t you hate having a one-sided friendship and being the doormat within a relationship you can’t help but care about? Whether you like it or not, it’s a toxic relationship and you need to find a way to distance yourself from that friend if not cut them out of your life completely.

Toxic friendships can really take a toll on all portions of your life. Your school work can be affected because you’re constantly checking your phone to see if they text you back, making it hard to focus and successfully finish an assignment. Your other relationships can be affected because you’re always complaining about them and annoying your other friends who just want to hang out with you.

They’re creating drama in your life even when they’re not there. They make you feel like you’re not good enough and make you question the validity of your other relationships.

toxic friends
“Everyone has that friend that only talks to you when they need something. You know the kind. That one person who only texts you once in a blue moon, when they need homework or advice.”

The friendship is only one-sided. They are never there for you when you are going through tough times. Even if you text them multiple times and you know they’ve read them, you convince yourself that they’re just busy and your problems aren’t that big of a deal anyway.

This relationship isn’t fair to you.

In any relationship, whether it be friendship or dating, you should never feel like your problems or your feelings aren’t valid. That is a huge red flag that should be taken seriously. You deserve to feel like an equal in the relationship, like the other person cares about you just as much as you care about them.

I know you care about them so much. Maybe you’ve been friends since you were little and the friendship has always been a big part of your life, but you need to realize that people do change.

Obviously, the person you thought they were doesn’t exist anymore and they don’t value your friendship as much as you do. If your “friend” is only your friend when they need something from you, whatever that may be, they aren’t truly your friend and you need to see that.

You deserve better and the second you figure that out, the happier you will be.

Highlanders Anonymous: He never texts me back

“What should I do if a boy says he likes me, but never texts me back and only does when I get mad?”

First of all, it could be that texting isn’t really his forté, although it’s unlikely. When you’re interested in somebody and they lead you to believe that they are too, things may get very frustrating. This is because you’ve built this person up to be someone in your mind that you are deserving of. That’s a good thing though. You want to set some standard for the people that you go out with.

However, you must know that not everyone is going to live up to your predetermined set of expectations. If they can’t do that, don’t wait up for them. In the end, you’ll only end up hurting yourself. Make sure you share your feelings with him before you go and write him off though. For example: If you don’t text me back, then it gives me the impression that you’re not interested. See what he has to say about that.

3_IMGS8299
“If you don’t text me back, then it gives me the impression that you’re not interested. See what he has to say about that.” Photo of: Jamie Zander. Photo by: Caroline Leggett.

“I have a friend who’s really similar to me and we have the same ambitions, so it’s really fun to work with her. Sometimes I feel like we compete too much. It gets to the point where we don’t feel like friends anymore. What do I do?”

It sounds to me like you might need to take a step back here and analyze your friendship. Why did you decide to be friends in the first place? If you feel that you still want to be friends after you answer that question, go outside of this work environment. Try doing something that friends do, where you can just relate to one another and do something fun. If that doesn’t go, maybe you all just don’t get along so well anymore. People change sometimes and can’t remain friends.

“What’s your opinion on the “Basic Bitch”? Some people think it’s ok, but others get really mad.”

I think that it’s a negative thing to call anyone a bitch in any context. The phrase “Basic Bitch” seems a little passive aggressive. If you don’t know your audience, it could be deemed offensive, so be careful when discussing it.

 

Thanks for all of the submissions, everyone. Good luck!

If you or someone you know has a problem, submit a question to Highlanders Anonymous.

Why sports are important

Throughout the semester, we are being mentally tested so often we sometimes forget about our physical health. It’s important to remember that exercise is critical to our overall well-being and health. Exercise has been shown to improve stamina, prevent disease, enhance flexibility, control body weight, develop muscles, and improve the quality of your life.

So what are some ways you can incorporate exercise into your life and have fun while doing it? Continue reading Why sports are important