Tag Archives: girlfriends

What to get your girlfriend for Christmas

Do you have trouble picking out the perfect present for your girlfriend? Does it make you nervous? Scared? Confused? Me too. Girls can be very hard to shop for, especially when they already have tons of clothes, jewelry, and things in general.

My girlfriend is very picking about presents and things she buys and she hates it when people buy her things that she doesn’t need. Does that sound familiar? It makes it so much harder to get her something good for Christmas. Here are some tips to get her the perfect Christmas present.

Just listen to your girlfriend! Photo from twoology
Just listen to your girlfriend! Photo from twoology

     

1. Listen

Believe it or not, if you listen to your girlfriend, she’ll most likely give you hints to what she wants, whether purposefully or not. You might be having a simple conversation when she brings up this thing she saw earlier today and she thought it was cute or pretty or just that she really liked it. She might drop more subtle, unconscious hints such as saying she really needs a new alarm clock or a new watch but doesn’t have the time to get one. Those are the subtle hints that you need to pick up on. Listening can really help when trying to figure out what to get her.

2. Pay Attention

Pay attention to what she likes to do. If she likes yoga, get her a new yoga mat. If she likes sports or music, get her tickets to a sporting event or a concert. Concert tickets are always a good idea. Nobody hates concerts. Does she like to hike or ride bikes? Does she like to draw or write? Then take her to a nice hiking trail, ride bikes up to a beautiful views, buy her a sketch pad or a journal. Most of the gifts or presents your girlfriend wants will be said within a month or two before Christmas. All you have to do is know your girlfriend, pay attention.

A girlfriend is a girlfriend. Photo from stephgrantphotography
A girlfriend is a girlfriend.
Photo from stephgrantphotography

 

These are the two tips for getting your girlfriend the perfect present. It really isn’t that hard. All you have to do is have a conversation with her and actually listen. A concept that is new to many but isn’t new to your girls. Be respectful and get her the gift she deserves.

Misconceptions about love

Love can mean so many things to so many people. It has a different definition for every situation. It can mean “I care about you, deeply” or “You are my one and only” or even “You are my best friend and I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

However, many people think love is the almighty power, that it can heal a broken heart and cure all pain in the world. This is a misconception. Love isn’t suppose to complete you or fill the void of self-loathing. It isn’t suppose to tell you your worth or how you value yourself.

Love is suppose to be something extra to enhance your life, not be the sole reason for your happiness. It allows you to share your life with another person, to tell them about the success you are having or even the hardship you are dealing with. Love should be the icing on the cake, not the ingredients.

One of the most common things I hear among my friends is “why can’t someone just love me? Everything would be so much better if I had someone to love me.”

First of all, one person cannot be the solution to all of life’s problems. Why would the love of somebody else make everything in life better? I feel as though if you need to love and affection of someone else to make you happy, then you are lacking in self-love and need to take a step back and find the strength in you to love yourself.

No one should feel like they need to depend on someone else to feel love because who knows how long that person will be in your life and when they’re gone, what will you be left with?

"[Y]ou don’t need to find your other half because you aren’t a half to begin with." Image from someecards.com
“[Y]ou don’t need to find your other half because you aren’t a half to begin with.” Image from someecards.com
Another phrase I hear frequently from my friends is “I want to find my other half, someone to complete me.” What I have to say to this is, you don’t need to find your other half because you aren’t a half to begin with. You are a whole person who can depend on yourself and love yourself. You are a complete person. You are not broken. There is nothing wrong with wanting another person to share your life with, to come home to and love with all that you are. But making another person your sole person in life and the only reason you can find your self-worth isn’t healthy.

Self-love should come first before you find another person to share your love with. There needs to be enough to go around.

Love can be life-changing, miraculous, and beautiful all at the same time. It can make you a better person, a happier person, but love should come from everywhere, not from one single person. Remember who you are and what you stand for before allowing yourself to share that with someone else.

Acting crazy doesn’t make you a better girlfriend

I recently saw a tweet that made me facepalm myself. A fellow female tweeted, “I’m sorry, but if your girlfriend doesn’t act absolutely insane toward you sometimes, she doesn’t love you.” Girls, this article’s for you. Guys, you can thank me later.

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“I know girls can act super crazy sometimes. I get super hormonal and emotional and even insecure from time to time.” Photo of: Selena Ruiz and Kevin Gray. Photo by: Danielle Johnson.

I know girls can act super crazy sometimes. I get super hormonal and emotional and even insecure from time to time. I know sometimes it can affect my significant other and make him want to rip his hair out, but I always make sure to apologize. But being crazy consistently in a relationship isn’t healthy and doesn’t prove you’re a more loving girlfriend. Being absolutely insane toward your partner will eventually push them away.

In my experience in relationships, I’ve found the best ones were the ones where I put my trust issues to the side and let myself trust someone. I’ve never felt the need to look through my partners phone or read their social media messages. However, I’ve had a very hard time trusting my significant other due to past experiences with people who weren’t so trust-worthy. If your partner does something that you’re uncomfortable with, confront them and take care of the issue like an adult. Don’t let it build up inside you and explode because most likely it won’t come out right.

I can’t imagine feeling so insecure in a relationship that I had to be constantly keeping tabs on my partner to feel like I could trust them. I know of several of my friends, mostly girls, who have asked to see their boyfriend’s phones and go through all of their texts and photos. I really don’t understand why anyone would continue a relationship where their partner didn’t make them feel secure. On the flip side of that, I can’t imagine why someone would want to stay with someone who was constantly keeping tabs on them. It’s not healthy.

The best relationships I’ve found are the ones where both people just let each other live their lives. One of my friends’ parents, for example, are one of the closest couples I’ve ever met. They’re more like best friends than husband and wife. However, they aren’t constantly keeping up with each other. When the husband leaves the house, he doesn’t feel the need to tell his wife where he’s going because she’s busy doing her own thing, and he’s usually just running errands or working.

Relationships are supposed to be built on trust and respect for each other. I’ve been lucky in my current relationship because I’ve never really felt like I couldn’t trust him. My boyfriend just moved across country to Colorado and although we text each other sporadically and call each other now and then, we aren’t constantly keeping up with each other. It’s nice to be able to shoot a text his way and talk a little bit, but it’s even better when we can call each other and have a lot to say because we aren’t constantly butting into each others business. Even from thousands of miles away, I feel secure in our relationship. I don’t need to worry that he’s giving someone else attention, because there’s no need to.

It can be really hard to feel secure if you’ve been with someone who’s given you a reason not to trust them. But until your current partner gives you a reason not to trust them, don’t act crazy and ask to see his or her phone and try to keep tabs on him. In the long run, it will make your partner appreciate you so much more and make you both happier.