Tag Archives: help

Standing

I made one mistake–
To tell the truth,
It helps to believe
The door is slammed shut
In my face.

Keep your mouth shut–
I never said anything of value,
You’d remember.
Kick and scream–
I run
Past the gate and
Down the road
So you don’t hear me
Whisper.

To be seen and not heard–
I’ve walked on tiptoe
All my life.
Chastise and lecture–
I leap
Over fields
So you won’t know I’m
Singing.

You don’t know the meaning
Of hard work–
I’ve spent sleepless
Hours reading and typing and writing
And working to pull myself
Out of the hole
You tell me is home.

girl writing
“To be seen and not heard– I’ve walked on tiptoe All my life.” Photo from: www.culturacolectiva.com

I worked every day of my life–
And I was grateful
Until today
You called me
Fool–
For wanting more–
More
Than trashed up trucks,
A wrecked house,
And more cracked eggshells
To creep over.

Get out.
Gone and running–
I fly
Farther than the sky
So you won’t see me
Standing.

Stress overload

When the going gets tough, the tough curl up in a ball and cry. Graphic form ethanandkayli.blogspot.com

As the final weeks of the semester are winding down, we all look to our lord and savior Jesus Christ for some guidance. When that doesn’t work, we drown our sorrows in alcohol and too much Netflix. We always hope that our responsibilities will disappear at the end of binge watching “The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt,” but unfortunately, the second you turn off the TV and realize it’s 6 in the morning and you have a test in 2 hours, you begin to panic and hope by taking a nap on your textbook the information will be forced into your strung out brain. The stress of being a college student while also being a general person is way too much to handle, most of the time.

I don’t understand why all college classes insist on throwing 14 papers, 23 tests, and 8 project at us within the last three weeks of class. Do they expect us to finish all of these assignments on time as well as actually turn in “A” worthy work? I’m not sure if they remember what it’s like to be in college, but they have to know that it feels impossible. On top of all of that, we have to find jobs for the summer, schedule our classes for next semester as well as possible summer classes, deal with a brother who’s trans ( maybe that one’s just for me, but still.)

We always get lectures from our parents about when they were our age they were working 7 jobs, walking 3 miles in the snow to get to school, and still managing to be student body president. First, we all know that’s a load of crap. Second, the cost to get an education is much higher now, not to mention how much the availability of jobs has gone down. The generation above us just don’t get how high the expectations are for us, how we have to continue to reach for the American dream, but what is the American dream anymore?

The stress can become way too much to handle. Sometimes it’s not about the amount of work we have to do, but it’s about what is expected of us. We have to achieve all A’s while maintaining a job that pays for rent and food as well as being a part of multiple extracurriculars and volunteer at an animal shelter in our free time. I just wish the older generation could calm down and try to understand the struggle we go through instead of lecturing us about how they had it so much worse. Stress can be dangerous and the high expectations need to stop if they want us to truly succeed in life.

Finding a job for the summer: The real struggle

Finding a job for the summer can be really difficult. I’ve almost had zero luck finding a job that’s hiring. I’ve look online, check individual websites, and even walked around Christiansburg, going into each store to ask if they were hiring, which was a difficult time for me because talking to strangers isn’t really my thing. I’m not sure if it’s me, or something about this time of the year, but jobs are nowhere to be found.

The only job experience I’ve had, other than the job I have working for Whim, is a cashier at Foodlion. It was not a good experience, to say the least. I had to stand on my feet for hours at a time, the customers were usually rude and ungrateful, and I was hit on by another employee more than I wish to talk about. I realized that working in grocery or working in an environment where I had to stand or check people’s items out just wasn’t for me.  I left that job after a year and a half because I was going to college and thought that I wouldn’t be able to drive back and forth from Blacksburg and Radford in time for classes as well as work. However, now that I’m a commuter, I realize that I will probably have to do that, seeing as there are no jobs in Radford and money is more and more of a necessity everyday.

desk
“The problem with the job hunt is there are some jobs, just jobs that I don’t want to do.”

The problem with the job hunt is there are some jobs, just jobs that I don’t want to do. Home Depot is hiring, but who wants to be a woman cashier at an establishment full of country men who like to refer to women as baby or honey? Also, I don’t want to be the stereotype of the gay girl who works at Home Depot. Places like Papa John’s are hiring but I feel like the money I spend on gas won’t be replaced with profit.

Maybe my problem is that I’m too picky. Maybe I need to get over my requirements I seem to have for a job and just be thankful for the opportunities that are available. However, if I’m going to work somewhere, I at least don’t want to completely hate my life or dread going to work. I want to enjoy my experiences in life and meet people who like my company and vice versa. Life is about more than money and working, although money would be ideal at the moment.

I think, by writing this article, I figured out what I need to do. Suck it up and work where I can. I should try and find the good in things instead of focusing on the bad. I should be thankful for the opportunities that are given to me, but that doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it all the time. I need money and money is at Home Depot and Papa John’s. If only I could make money by sitting at home, eating, and watching Bob’s Burgers. If only.

Struggles of being a girl

Are you a person who has boobs and a vagina? Do you have trouble with bras and typical materials that girls use? The struggle is all too real and it’s honestly unfair all the troubles us girls have to go through. Here are some of the main struggles I go through. I’m sure you’ll be able to relate.

    1. Sticky Bras

 

    Sticky bras can save your life or make it harder. They’re suppose to replace your regular, strappy bra, but be better. They stick to your boobs making a clasp in the back irrelevant and taking away the visibility of the clasp so you can wear backless dresses or shirts. They also make straps unnecessary, allowing you to wear dresses and shirts that come off the shoulder without being embarrassed about your straps showing. However, after a while, sticky bras can become, well, unsticky, making it very difficult to keep it on. You’ll be out with your friends when you hear the stickiness coming off, sagging your boobs, or completely falling off. All of the sudden, your bra is at your stomach and you’re forced to run to the bathroom without anyone seeing your bra or boobs falling to the ground. They’re a great invention; unfortunately, they will turn on you in the blink of an eye.

Being a girl can be hard. Photo from fakeplus
Being a girl can be hard.
Photo from fakeplus

 

   2Cameltoes

    Every girl can obtain a cameltoe. It all depends on the type of pants that you wear. Yoga pants are the major culprits, though. If you don’t know what a cameltoe is, it occurs when your pants or undergarments get pushed or stuck up in your vagina, making the image of a camel’s toe. It’s kind of gross, I know, but these things happen and sometimes you really can’t control it. Some things you can do it prevent a camel toe include wearing looser pants. Looser pants should prevent a camel toe from occurring because the fabric will be far enough away that it won’t be able to get stuck up there. You can also put a sock in your pants. A sock will create a barrier between your vagina and your pants preventing the camel toe from occurring. 

    3. Nipples

    Everyone has nipples, boys and girls. However, girls are more frowned upon, in society, for showing their nipples, whether it be on purpose or not. Girls hate it when their nipples show through their bra or their shirt, whether it’s because of the color of the nipple or because they are hard. Both of these reasons are unpreventable and can be very annoying.

A couple of tricks you can use to cover up your nipples are putting toilet paper between your nipples and the shirt or bra. People won’t be able to see the toilet paper or your nipples and everyone is happy. You can also place bandaids or tape on top of your nipples to stop them from poking through.

Being a girl can be very troublesome and difficult. However, with the right tips and tricks, you can walk outside confidently and fabulously without your bra, camel toe, or nipples saying hello to every stranger walking by. Be proud to be a girl and make it work.

Thanksgiving: Love it or hate it?

Thanksgiving is just around the corner and for some people it’s an exciting holiday, one of nice family get togethers and the sharing of love and great food. For others, it’s a holiday to be dreaded, dealing with racist and homophobic extended relatives and having to answer the same damn questions over and over again. No matter what your circumstance is, Thanksgiving is happening and you’re going to have to deal with people that you don’t like. However, here are some tips to deal with awkward and uncomfortable family encounters.

  1. Force your way through small talk

Dealing with relatives can be easy or hard. It all depends on how you approach the situation. Small talk is something that I, personally, can’t stand. It’s superficial and boring. I don’t really care how your job has been or how your snot-nosed child is doing. I know that they really don’t care about the classes I’m taking in college or what I hope to do in the future, but for some reason, society says it’s what people do to be polite, to be conversational.

To get through introductions and small talk with your family, answer one of their questions as quickly as you can and then excuse yourself to the bathroom. Trust me, it works every time. If they attempt to approach you again, excuse yourself once more by saying, “I have to help my mom in the kitchen.” Not only do you get away from their stupid questions, you also are perceived as helpful and kind to your mother. What more could you ask for?

  1. Ignore or call out you bigot relatives

Depending on your relatives and your personality, these two options are up to you. If you’re shy, don’t feel like starting a fight, or you know your relatives would react badly to any sort of argument to their dumb comments, simply ignore them. Depending on how old they are, trying to change the mind of your 92-year-old grandma on why you dating a black person is okay is a pointless argument. She’s old and was brought up in a certain way of thinking, just like you were. At this point, it doesn’t really matter.

On the other hand, if you are sick and tired of hearing the same bigotry that you do every year, stand up to them. Make them understand why they are wrong and why it needs to stop. Even if you simply say that their comments make you uncomfortable, without saying why or how it affects you directly, it should be enough to shut them up. Do whatever feels right to you.

Do you have a crazy family? Photo from pinterest
Do you have a crazy family? Photo from pinterest

Thanksgiving is a holiday you either love or hate. You can choose to love it if you pick your battles and know when enough is enough. The point of Thanksgiving is to be love and give love, be thankful for what you have and who you have it with. Stupid relatives with dumb views shouldn’t affect the meaning of the holiday. Have fun and tell those bigots where to stick it.

I’m so f****** stressed out

If you can’t tell by the title, I’m so F****** stressed out. I don’t even know what to do anymore. I feel every single emotion at once. Anger, frustration, sadness, adrenaline, excitement, fear, and the list goes on and on. Leaving high school, I never thought college would be this stressful. Everybody always says “Oh, college is so much better. Just wait.” Well, it looks like I’m still waiting for college to not suck as much as it does now.

There are way too many things to juggle in college. School work, home work, work work, social life, family life, trying to figure what I want to do with my life, and so on. I’m stressed out all the time and I don’t know how to turn my brain off. Attempting to do all of the stuff on my to-do list is frustrating and annoying and I wish I had someone to help me. But I realize that most of the things I need to do are things I need to do myself, things that I need to accomplish on my own. That doesn’t change the fact that I hate it and I wish it would all just stop for a little bit.

Do you feel like stress is grabbing at you? Photo from pinterest
Do you feel like stress is grabbing at you?
Photo from pinterest

Being an adult is terrifying. Who knew that having all of this responsibility for my own work and for myself would be paralyzingly stressful. High school and other experiences try and prepare for what college has to offer, but no experience can truly depict what it feels like to be in college. It feels like you’re constantly running a marathon but you don’t know what you’re running towards, what the end looks like. You just keep running and running because everybody else is. But what is the point of it all?

I’m still trying to figure out my purpose in life, why I was put on this earth. I still don’t understand why we are put through the experiences that we are and what lesson we’re supposed to learn from it. I don’t understand life or what it all means, and I probably will never find out. But what I do know is that everything does have a purpose and a meaning. College is supposed to teach us something valuable and everything happens for a reason.

You should go to therapy. Trust me.

Have you ever thought about going to therapy? Maybe you’re thinking “I don’t need to go to therapy. Isn’t therapy for people who are really struggling with intense issues or they’re just crazy?” Well that isn’t necessarily the case. Yes, a lot of people who are in therapy are struggling with depression, anxiety, or other mental issues; however, therapy is simply an outlet for people to talk about their problem, whether they’re anxiety driven or not.

Going to a therapist was one of the best decisions I ever made. I began going to therapy because I was dealing with anxiety and struggling with my sexual identity; however, after I figured all of those things out, I continued to go because it was one of the most therapeutic and relaxing experiences I have ever had. I was allowed to talk about things, drama and other stressors, without the back and forth you have to have with your friends. I sat there for an hour as she listened to me talk and talk and my crappy friends and my messed up parents and she gave me advice and support. With friends, they can say “I’m here for you” and all those other cliche phrases but you know deep down that they have their own lives to deal with and they’re just waiting for their turn to talk. With therapy, the therapist sits there and talks to you like you’re friends but doesn’t expect anything in return from you. They are simply there to help guide you in the right direction and make sure that you are going to be okay. It’s fulfilling and relieving.

And how does that make you feel?  Photo from healthcommunities.com
And how does that make you feel?
Photo from healthcommunities.com

The best part about going to therapy is they know nothing about you. They don’t know anyone else’s side of the story and they don’t know the history of you or anyone else in your life. When you complain about someone or something, they have zero bias on the situation so they can give you honest and genuine advice about the situation. They tell you how it is based on the information you give them. With friends or parents, they usually understand the whole situation or have known the other people in the scenario, making it harder for them to stay unbiased. If you’re choosing between talking to a friend or a therapist, I’d go with therapy every time.

I understand that therapy isn’t for everybody; however, if you’ve never tried it what’s the harm? You may discover that you love it and it helps you more than any friend ever could or you could realise that you hate it and you never want to go back again and that’s okay too. Whatever the outcome may be, try therapy. It made me a happier person.

Transgender issues hit home

Transgender people are simply that: people. They are the same as me and you, just with unique circumstances. Don’t you think that all people should be treated equally? That all people deserve the same rights and privileges as others? Isn’t America the land of the free and the home of the brave? What kind of world do we live in where people are being murdered every other day for being different, for being transgender?

That is not a world I want to live in, and not a country I want to be associated with  the way things are right now. I never understood the importance of transgender issues and transgender abuse until recently, when these issues began to impact me personally.

Transgender people are just people. Photo from Caitlyn Jenner.
Transgender people are just people. Photo from Caitlyn Jenner.

You can never really understand what it’s like to be affected by transgender issues until it relates to you personally. You could go on all day about how you’d vote over and over again for equal rights for all, but you never understand the true impact and importance of it all unless you are affected directly.

On Friday, October 30th, my little brother came out to me as transgender. I was shocked, to say the least; however, I had some idea that something was bothering him for sometime and somehow, I just knew. From my dance costumes he loved to wear when we was three to him growing out his hair since last

year, there have been subtle signs for as long as I can remember.

My first thought when he told me was “What if he gets murdered for being his true self?” “What if he gets hurt or bullied or something awful because he can’t hide his true self anymore?”

I was scared for him. He’s my baby brother and I need to protect him, but in this situation, I can’t control the actions of the world around me and it’s one of the most frustrating and scary feelings I have ever experienced.

I shouldn’t have to have these thoughts. I shouldn’t have to be scared for my brother’s life because of what the world and society has done to transgender people. He needs to become the person he is meant to be and I nor my family are going to let the world stop him from being happy.

Being transgender in America is dangerous, but it shouldn’t be. We, as the people of the United States, should stand up against the crimes being committed against transgender people and bring the country together as one.

We should all be equal under the constitution and no person should walk the streets of America afraid for being who they are.

Why the hamburger bun writing style will stick with you

In elementary school, I’m sure everyone learned about the hamburger writing style. Your teacher had you, and the rest of your class, draw the outline of a hamburger. The burger consisted of a top bun, lettuce, cheese, a patty, and a bottom bun. It was fun and it made the class more interested in whatever they were about to learn. The teacher then proceeds to tell you that you must now right an opening to a paper in the top bun, 3 middle sections where the lettuce, cheese, and patty reside, and a closing paragraph in the bottom bun to end the paper.

Remember the hamburger writing method? Graphic from Hamburger Me
Remember the hamburger writing method? Graphic from Hamburger Me

Now, whenever I write a paper I am struggling with, or one I am having trouble separating the paragraphs or putting in order, I resort back to my hamburger bun. It seems silly, drawing a hamburger and writing inside of it. Especially for a college kid, if anyone else saw you doing that they would think you were a little off, but it really does help. It helps you focus more on one section of the paper at a time than the entire overwhelming 4-5 paragraphs or 4-5 pages. I also draw out my hamburger outline and focus on my top bun first, my opener. Then I move onto the detail and examples in my paper, which is the middle of my burger, and I draw that out too. It seems excessive to draw it all out but I feel this writing technique really improves my writing.

Another way this tool from my elementary school days helps me is that it lets me think of a topic to write down for each paragraph. I think of a few key points for an introduction paragraph and then give more detail and explain what I mean. Next, I move on to my examples within my paper and I write down examples but don’t do anything with them until I start to write the entire paper. The hamburger bun writing outline seems silly but it is something I will use and go to for help for the rest of my life.

Highlanders Anonymous: Insomniacs and Adderall addicts unite

“I can’t sleep. No matter what I do, I find myself up until 4 a.m. each night despite having an 8 a.m. every day. I don’t drink caffeine and I try to eat healthy, so it’s not like I’m having a sugar overload. I just lay in bed for hours tossing and turning only to get more frustrated.  I’m not sure exactly what’s causing me to stay awake.” Continue reading Highlanders Anonymous: Insomniacs and Adderall addicts unite

Highlanders Anonymous is back!

Have any questions you’re embarrassed about or make you feel uncomfortable when you ask aloud? Are you having relationship problems? Do you have any pent up sexual anxiety that you want to get off your chest but are too shy to voice aloud?

What secrets do you have to share? Image from Creative Commons.
What secrets do you have to share? Image from Creative Commons.

You’re in luck. The Whim staff is pleased to announce Highlanders Anonymous is back and will begin this week, under the Life section.

Highlanders Anonymous is a place where Radford University students can turn with all of their unanswered questions. Continue reading Highlanders Anonymous is back!

Homeless man who returned ring receives large donation

Every now and then my faith in humanity gets restored.

A homeless man named Billy Ray Harris was asking for change under an overpass in Missouri when a woman named Sarah Darling decided to give him the contents of her coin purse. Darling had forgotten that earlier in the day she had put her diamond wedding ring in that coin purse because it was giving her a rash. The next day, she realized that she had accidentally dropped the ring in Harris’s cup. In a panic she drove back to where he had been sitting but to no avail. She came back the day after and was fortunate enough to find Billy Ray. She asked him about the ring and he replied that he had kept it for her and he returned it with no questions asked. Continue reading Homeless man who returned ring receives large donation

Angel tree for pets

While the semester is coming to an end, Radford University students have a lot on their minds. Studying, finals, projects, papers, Christmas, gifts, food, decorations and everything else that goes along with the holiday season fills the agendas of every student. As if we don’t have enough to worry about, there is one thing that we can add to that list of to-dos that will be beneficial to everyone. Continue reading Angel tree for pets