Tag Archives: independent

Being Confident

Walking across campus, going out on a Friday night with some friends, or giving a presentation in front of classmates all are very different activities. However, they share something similar which is confidence. All of these things and more take confidence to not just fulfill them but fulfill them well.

look-in-the-mirror
“The important thing is to stay confident in yourself.”

It can be intimidating walking across campus to different classes, back and forth from your home, especially if you’re a freshman.. Even if you’re not a freshman but an upperclassman it can still make you feel tense and uncomfortable at least at certain times. The thing to remember about being confident is that everyone around you is going through the same thing you are.

Questioning if they should call somebody, or staring down at their phone on the way to class if they don’t have anyone to talk  walk with, wondering if their outfit is good enough for going out to a restaurant on a Friday night, and if they look decent, or if their presentation is up to standards and if they can deliver it without stuttering or stumbling on a word or two. Everyone gets nervous and doesn’t feel confident at some point in their life. The trick is to remember that you’re not alone. You’re sharing that feeling with so many other people surrounding you or not, others feel the same way you do.

People will understand how you’re feeling walking to class, staring off into space and just thinking, if people will like your outfit you decide to wear out on that Friday night, and people will feel your pain if you slip up in your presentation to the class because these things happen to everyone. We’re all human and make mistakes or go through embarrassing moments, it’s a way of life. The important thing is to stay confident in yourself and that will get you through whatever it is you’re going through or over-thinking in your head. Confidence is key!

Finding my independence

When I was in high school, I thought about college as a time and place when I could finally get out on my own, find my independence, and live by myself. I thought that I would live in a dorm, make new friends, discover who I am and what I meant to do in this lifetime. However, what I came to discover is I’d be living at home, making zero new friends, and still in the same place, mentally, that I was when I graduated high school.

You're not defined by other people. Be like Tina. Graphic from popsugar.com
You’re not defined by other people. Be like Tina. Graphic from popsugar.com

Living at home is hard. I have to deal with the same dramas, issues, and all around bullshit that comes with having a kind of messed up family. Ever since I was a child, I’ve had to take on a parent role, making sure everyone has what they need and keeping the peace between certain family members. I understand now, that I don’t want to do it anymore. I want to live my own life and meet new people, have new experiences and not be forced into taking care of everyone else. I want a space that I can call my own; a place that my parents can’t storm into and tell me to take care of this or that. I understand that responsibility is a part of growing up, but not the kind of responsibility that I’ve had to handle. I want to be able to show them that I can take care of myself, that I’m ready to be on my own, to become my own person, without their influence or watchful eye.

I need a space that is empty of negative energy. With all of the issues surrounding my brothers and my dad, it’s hard to get away from the overwhelming sadness and frustration that envelopes my childhood home. Don’t think that this makes me ungrateful because I’m extremely grateful for everything my mom has done for me and my siblings. It simply means that I’m ready to have my own apartment, to have my own feelings, to not feel suffocated by other people’s anxieties, to have my own life.  

Weekly Time Wasters: The end of the world and twerking

Independent short films are one of the greatest perks of the Internet (besides porn of course). This one, while a little preachy at the end, is nevertheless very well done. Every time I see one of these, it convinces me that I need to learn how to do CGI, but then I go and look at pictures of cats on Reddit. Maybe one day. Continue reading Weekly Time Wasters: The end of the world and twerking