Tag Archives: Lesbian

Don’t you wish you were a lesbian?

Have you ever heard one of your straight friends say “I wish I was a lesbian. It would be so much easier!” Or “I’m so done with boys. I’m going to become a lesbian.” If you haven’t, it means you are that friend and you need to stop.

These statements are not only ridiculous but also illogical. Do you really think you can just become a lesbian if you want to? Do you think you can simply wake up one morning and be a lesbian? I hate to break it to you, but that isn’t how it works. Not only are these sayings incorrect, but they are also rude and simply ignorant.

Wouldn’t being a lesbian be easier? Graphic from someecards.com

Wouldn’t being a lesbian be easier? Graphic from someecards.com

I have one question for you. How is “becoming” a lesbian easier for you? Is it easier because of all the rejection and bullying you will receive? Or is easier because your parents could potentially kick you out or stop paying for you college?

Being gay isn’t something to do when you’re bored or when you’re mad at your boyfriend. It is who some people are and they don’t need you belittling their sexuality because your crush doesn’t text you back.

Have you ever heard someone say “That must be so nice, being a lesbian and being hot. Boys can stare at you and hit on you and you can easily turn them down by saying you’re a lesbian,” because I have.

First of all, what? Being a lesbian, the last thing I want is some drooling frat boy hitting on me or staring at me.  

Second of all, have you met a college boy? Do you really think that by me saying I’m a lesbian would stop them? Many straight guys have no respect for us gay girls. They will either ask for a threesome or say they have the “cure” for being gay which I’m sure you can connect the dots to what the “cure” is.

Third of all, if you want to turn a boy down or tell him you’re not interested, you don’t have to use the excuse of being a lesbian. Simply tell them to go away. If they don’t, go grab one of your boyfriends or walk away yourself. You don’t need to objectify someone else’s sexuality to get some gross boy away from you.

Being gay isn’t some accessory for you to wear out one night so you can avoid being hit on. It isn’t a fun game to play when you’re mad at your boyfriend or some guy hurt your feelings.

Being gay is someone else’s reality, it might not be yours, but guess what? The world doesn’t revolve around you.

 

National Coming Out Day

October 11, 2015 is National Coming Out Day. National Coming Out Day is a day to celebrate those who have come out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer or for those who haven’t come out yet and need to encouragement to continue to have the strength to be who they truly are, maybe giving them enough bravery to come out on this day.

Let the rainbow out. Graphic from Stop Homophobia
Let the rainbow out. Graphic from Stop Homophobia

The LGBTQ community has experienced violence, sexual assaults, oppression, and even murder simply because they of who they are. Coming out is a huge decision that could potentially change someone’s life forever and it isn’t a decision that should be taken lightly.

Three years ago, I came out to my mom and it was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life. I remember thinking what if she kicks me out? What if she doesn’t love me anymore? What if she thinks I’m so disgusting that she can’t even look at me anymore?

I thought these things because of what was happening to gay people all over the world in the media. People were getting abused physically and sexually, kicked out of their own homes, and even murdered.

I was petrified at the thought of any of that happening to me. One of my friends came out to his parents as transgender and they kicked him out, taking away his phone, his car, and basically everything he had. He had to grow up very quickly, getting a job and finding a place to stay. 40 percent of homeless youth are part of the LGBTQ community. I thought to myself if he was turned away by his parents, completely abandoned by the people who were supposed to love him the most, how do I know my parents won’t do the same?

I realized after three years of holding in this secret, that it was tearing me apart inside, and I had to tell my mom. I felt that it was unfair of me to keep this from her, to not allow her to support me in a way that I really needed at the time.

 

“I told her as we were waiting at a stop light, just blurted it out and she laughed and told me that she already knew.”

 

She told me that she loved me and that it doesn’t change anything, and she was right. I was one of the lucky ones, to have supportive parents who didn’t care who I loved or how I loved. I’m grateful every day for the way the allow me to by myself, to talk to them about my love life and have them not feel uncomfortable or have me feel uncomfortable. Love should be unconditional and unfortunately not everyone is built or mature enough to feel the same.

Being gay is not accepted in most parts of the country, although there has been amazing progression on the topic, with gay marriage becoming legal in 37 states. There is still so much progress that needs to be done and so much acceptance that needs to occur for the LGBTQ community to truly feel normal in society. National coming out day is a day that should be celebrated but not to be taken lightly.

Come out when you want to and when you feel is safe and right for you.

Highlanders Anonymous: Romance, threesomes and ambiguity!

Question: “There’s a girl that I like that just got out of a long relationship and doesn’t want to see anyone at the moment. What should I do in order to win her heart or at least make her give me a chance?”

Answer: It depends on why she’s telling you that, whether you’ve asked her out or not and whether or not it looks like she’s trying to friend zone you.

Continue reading Highlanders Anonymous: Romance, threesomes and ambiguity!