Tag Archives: Straight

Is it cheating?

When it comes to relationships, everyone has a different definition of cheating. For some people, cheating strictly means having sex with someone else. For other, kissing or even just thinking about being with someone else is cheating and isn’t tolerated, a zero toleration policy. I know one couple who give each other passes, where they can do whatever they want with other people and face no consequences for it. Here are the main ways to cheat and the different viewpoints surrounding them.

  1. Is it cheating? Graphic from Sex Advice Online
    Is it cheating? Graphic from Sex Advice Online

    Is thinking about another person intimately cheating?

In many relationships, mentally cheating on someone is the same, if not worse, than physically cheating on them. Relationships are based on a mental and emotional connection and if that get severed, than the basis for one’s relationship is broken or, essentially, built on false pretenses the entire time. It would be absolutely heartbreaking to know that your relationship is a lie and the connection you thought you had with someone is not as special as you thought.

  1. Is watching porn cheating?

Some people believe that watching porn is cheating, based on the idea that watching other people have sex is connecting to the cheating mentally idea. If you’re thinking about other people sexually, going as far as masturbating to other people, then essentially you’re having sex with different people in your mind, making it cheating and devastating to your partner.

  1.  When straight girls kiss other girls while being in a relationship, is it cheating?

This is a controversial question. There are many guys who would say no to this question because they think their girlfriends kissing other girls is hot and, somewhat, not real because they aren’t gay. However, this idea is detrimental to the gay community. It’s what doesn’t stop guys from hitting on girls who say they have a girlfriend. They don’t take it seriously because they think all lesbians are kissing girls for their entertainment and that, in the end, they’ll go back to dating men.

Girls kissing other girls should be considered cheating because it is. The gender of the person who is cheating with the person in the relationship really doesn’t matter. They were unfaithful. Simple as that.

Cheating, I think, is a black and white issue. Did you kiss/have sex with someone who isn’t me? Yes? Then you cheated on me. Bye. Although I agree that some cases of cheating are more complicated than others, cheating is cheating and it should never be done, no matter the circumstances. If you’re having problems in the relationship, talk them out. If you break up, that’s okay. It’s way better the break up than to cheat on your partner. Think before your decide to cheat.

Not everything needs a label

Sexuality is a social construct. It’s an idea or theory developed strictly on what society believes should define its citizens. It’s a way for society to put people in a box, to put a label on everyone in order to keep its people in line, to keep confusion and outliers out of the picture.

Why do people need labels in the first place? Why do we feel the need to fit into a certain category in order to make other people feel more comfortable? In a society that is based on individualism, don’t you think it’s a bit odd that we feel the need to group people, whether it be in sections of gender, race, sexuality, or any other way?

It doesn't matter what your gender identity or sexuality is. We're all the same in the end.  Photo from rachelwentzbook.blogspot.com
It doesn’t matter what your gender identity or sexuality is. We’re all the same in the end.
Photo from rachelwentzbook.blogspot.com

Not only is sexuality a social construct, but it’s also fluid. Sexuality is a spectrum, varying from one side to the other, with a giant space in between. That’s not to say that a person can’t identify with a specific sexuality, but it’s much more common for an individual to fit somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, or a least a little to the left or a little to the right from each extreme. More often than not, individuals feel the need to label themselves as a specific sexuality, whether it be gay, straight, or bisexual, when in reality, they don’t fit into one definite category. Society puts a certain pressure on people, to make them conform, even when it isn’t authentic to who a person is. It’s hard to be different in a society that doesn’t accept differences in itself.

There are many other sexualities other than gay, straight, and bisexual including pansexual, demisexual, asexual, and others, and even then, certain people wouldn’t feel that those labels accurately represent how they feel.

There should be no reason, in the first place, why a person would feel the need to put themselves in a box, to stick a label on their chest and say “this is who I like to date.” Sexuality isn’t the only thing that defines a person and there’s no point in trying to define oneself in the first place. People are complicated. Let’s leave it at that.

Don’t you wish you were a lesbian?

Have you ever heard one of your straight friends say “I wish I was a lesbian. It would be so much easier!” Or “I’m so done with boys. I’m going to become a lesbian.” If you haven’t, it means you are that friend and you need to stop.

These statements are not only ridiculous but also illogical. Do you really think you can just become a lesbian if you want to? Do you think you can simply wake up one morning and be a lesbian? I hate to break it to you, but that isn’t how it works. Not only are these sayings incorrect, but they are also rude and simply ignorant.

Wouldn’t being a lesbian be easier? Graphic from someecards.com

Wouldn’t being a lesbian be easier? Graphic from someecards.com

I have one question for you. How is “becoming” a lesbian easier for you? Is it easier because of all the rejection and bullying you will receive? Or is easier because your parents could potentially kick you out or stop paying for you college?

Being gay isn’t something to do when you’re bored or when you’re mad at your boyfriend. It is who some people are and they don’t need you belittling their sexuality because your crush doesn’t text you back.

Have you ever heard someone say “That must be so nice, being a lesbian and being hot. Boys can stare at you and hit on you and you can easily turn them down by saying you’re a lesbian,” because I have.

First of all, what? Being a lesbian, the last thing I want is some drooling frat boy hitting on me or staring at me.  

Second of all, have you met a college boy? Do you really think that by me saying I’m a lesbian would stop them? Many straight guys have no respect for us gay girls. They will either ask for a threesome or say they have the “cure” for being gay which I’m sure you can connect the dots to what the “cure” is.

Third of all, if you want to turn a boy down or tell him you’re not interested, you don’t have to use the excuse of being a lesbian. Simply tell them to go away. If they don’t, go grab one of your boyfriends or walk away yourself. You don’t need to objectify someone else’s sexuality to get some gross boy away from you.

Being gay isn’t some accessory for you to wear out one night so you can avoid being hit on. It isn’t a fun game to play when you’re mad at your boyfriend or some guy hurt your feelings.

Being gay is someone else’s reality, it might not be yours, but guess what? The world doesn’t revolve around you.

 

Come to RU’s next Club Fair!

A lot of students look forward to Radford University’s club fair, a semiannual campus event that occurs at the start of each semester featuring  on-campus organizations that invite the student body, new and old, to participate and enrich their social and academic lives in college.

Continue reading Come to RU’s next Club Fair!